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Heres an oldie to help your cold day..

There was an old drunk in a bar talking to a big burly bartender. He said," I bet you a hundred bucks I can bite my right eyeball!". Now the bartender knows he is drunk and figures its an easy take so he makes the bet. The old man takes his glass eye out and bites it winning the bet.

After a few more drinks the old man says," Wanna make your money back? I bet you another 100 that i cn bite my LEFT eyeball!" Now the bartender knows the man isnt blind so he takes the bet. The old man takes his false teeth out and bites his left eyeball, winning the bet! The bartender pays up but isnt too happy about it.

A couple of hours later the old man is back at the bar. He says," wanna get your money back? I bet you 200 bucks I can pizz one of those beer pitchers FULL before you can slide it down that bar!" Now the bartender knows he can really sling it down the bar and there is no way so he takes the bet. The ol man gets up on a barstool and gets ready. The bartender lets fly and the old man just wizzes everywhere and only gets a few drops in the pitcher. He sat down and had a good laugh with the bartender before paying up.

The bartender said,"You know when you hustled me for 200 bucks, I was MAD! How can you be so happy about loosing?" The old man said, "Thats ok son, I bet those guys over there 10,000 bucks that i could pizz all over you and your bar and make you think it was funny!"

Moral....Never bet on another mans game!
 

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That was one of those reads where I had the visual workin real good so I busted out laughin...would score about 3 of the laughin icons...if I HAD the icons....
 

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I heard one similar to that before. Its still funny lol
 

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NICE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
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